For those of you not on facebook, we're alive and well around here!
As in well, I mean we are finding a new normal. A different normal. Our normal, for now.
Work is busy busy busy. Projects that started months ago that are lingering are in the final stages. We are thrilled to mentally "check them off the list". We are thrilled to see our business not just sit but be booked out until December! What a glorious fact indeed.
Around the house, our new normal is paper plates, quick meals and genuinely seeping in gratitude for those who have helped. I was well prepared for having a baby, I had meals prepped and a realistic expectation for a peaceful transition... I wasn't prepared for this new normal but by the blessing of those who have extended their love for us with service, I think I am ready to call this my normal now and have a realistic expectation of what my day will look like!
I'm putting myself through "school". I'm learning so much about muscles, their functions, how they develop and relate to each other for effective use for a lifetime of needing to consume food. I purchased a book that is stretching my brain in all directions. It's not a light reading type book, so when I'm exhausted, I often have to re-read the same page a few times to fully grasp it's text. I'm taking copious amounts of notes.
I'm putting myself through "school". I'm learning so much about muscles, their functions, how they develop and relate to each other for effective use for a lifetime of needing to consume food. I purchased a book that is stretching my brain in all directions. It's not a light reading type book, so when I'm exhausted, I often have to re-read the same page a few times to fully grasp it's text. I'm taking copious amounts of notes.
And the pictures are awesome!
Life is continuing to move at lightening speed... Aurora is thrilled with losing her front top tooth (this makes tooth #3 for her) and she is working on getting out her other front tooth. Silly girl!
Years ago there was a point of contention in my marriage.... Nothing huge, just irritating mostly. This point of contention was over laundry. Specifically there was laundry always sitting on the couch, usually folded and waiting to be put away. At that time, I decided that the way to resolve this contention was simple: I went out and bought myself a LAUNDRY couch. I'm not even kidding. I specifically acquired a couch so I could sit laundry on it and fold it and we could have our other couch for sitting. (Oh my poor husband) Well, as a few years passed and I grew into a routine of chores, the couch began to bother me too. In a stunning move, I offed the couch and began to keep up with laundry very well with habit.
Well folks, I'm here to tell you that in this new normal, my familiar couch has returned. Since I consider this temporary, I am not going out to get another couch but for now, I am peacefully accepting that what I am accomplishing with Anaius is far more important than a few months of irritating laundry on my couch. Neither of us seem to care too much either. We're busy mountain climbing. The clothes are clean and folded, but that final step sometimes just doesn't get done. Oh well.
Well folks, I'm here to tell you that in this new normal, my familiar couch has returned. Since I consider this temporary, I am not going out to get another couch but for now, I am peacefully accepting that what I am accomplishing with Anaius is far more important than a few months of irritating laundry on my couch. Neither of us seem to care too much either. We're busy mountain climbing. The clothes are clean and folded, but that final step sometimes just doesn't get done. Oh well.
Realistic expectations for this new normal are critically important to sanity!
But fear not, I have amazing helpers who are just all too willing to clean the house....
When I asked her what she was doing, she replied simply "the window was dirty"...
In other news, my awesome mom-mobile rolled over into a new mileage. And to think, this is our low-miles vehicle, our truck sits with over 350,000.
I accomplished a MAJOR feat last week.
Let me tell you a simple fact about my life right now - I pump ALL.THE.TIME. To ensure that my baby has enough milk and to re-establish a supply that was badly damaged through stress, I am pumping every 2 hours around the clock. Without fail, I am attached to this machine and with each tiny drop, I am further committed to understanding the complexity of his needs. When Anaius is sound asleep in the middle of the night, I still have to get up.
Since this was my new normal, I knew immediately that to ensure my sanity, I had to find a way OUT of the house. First, I overcame my shame surrounding deep feelings of failing my baby somehow and I asked for help. I asked three safe friends if I could come to their planned gatherings at their homes and find a safe place to pump in their home. All three said yes and I cannot tell you how scared I was that they would say no. I didn't even realize it until they responded.
Well, then there was the logistics of balancing a baby, lugging around a pump, and all that.... Man, this is complicated!
This photo is shared with sincere pride that I have not crumbled. I still get out of the house. I still have friends who love and support me. I am finding my new normal.
Let me tell you a simple fact about my life right now - I pump ALL.THE.TIME. To ensure that my baby has enough milk and to re-establish a supply that was badly damaged through stress, I am pumping every 2 hours around the clock. Without fail, I am attached to this machine and with each tiny drop, I am further committed to understanding the complexity of his needs. When Anaius is sound asleep in the middle of the night, I still have to get up.
Since this was my new normal, I knew immediately that to ensure my sanity, I had to find a way OUT of the house. First, I overcame my shame surrounding deep feelings of failing my baby somehow and I asked for help. I asked three safe friends if I could come to their planned gatherings at their homes and find a safe place to pump in their home. All three said yes and I cannot tell you how scared I was that they would say no. I didn't even realize it until they responded.
Well, then there was the logistics of balancing a baby, lugging around a pump, and all that.... Man, this is complicated!
This photo is shared with sincere pride that I have not crumbled. I still get out of the house. I still have friends who love and support me. I am finding my new normal.
That's me, sitting on the floor of a friends daughters room, with my sleeping baby shifted comfortably to my back and I'm pumping.
I still felt bad a bit. At both places, I was the last to leave and I didn't want to feel like I was imposing my trial on their schedules. I'm working through that. I am having to check my emotional fears and realize that adults can and do express their thoughts without me placing them in their heads for them.
We're also successfully finding a schedule that allows us to breathe fresh air. Getting out and walking the dog. Seeing the blue sky. Being the new normal for us.
I'm also realistic that if I'm awake every 2 hours (3 hours max at night) around the clock, I need to nap.
And apparently my big girls decided it was OK to take a picture of me while sound asleep.... At least I'm not snoring or drooling on him :)
We're also successfully finding a schedule that allows us to breathe fresh air. Getting out and walking the dog. Seeing the blue sky. Being the new normal for us.
I'm also realistic that if I'm awake every 2 hours (3 hours max at night) around the clock, I need to nap.
And apparently my big girls decided it was OK to take a picture of me while sound asleep.... At least I'm not snoring or drooling on him :)
There is so much to say, so little time.
My alarm is ringing on my phone - off I go to go pump!
<3
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